YAY and BOO

So yesterday I got my lip pierced! FINALLLLYYYY! Im really proud of myself :)

I was adamant I wouldn't get it done without it being numbed, but when I got there they said theyr not allowed to numb it or something. Obviously I was gutted, and was begging them to do it haha. Anyways, they said to me that if i do wanna get it done the same day I would need to eat because i look so pale i look anemic, n me n dean just laughed and i said nah im wearing ALOT of makeup :P

So anyways I left and said I'll think about it, had a maccies.. well... TRIED to eat a maccies but I was far too nervous lol then afterwards I completely covered my lip in numbing cream hoping they wouldn't notice haha. Got there, and then after i'd filled in all the forms the numbing cream had worn off :P So that was a waste of time

Anywho - I went downstairs and sat on the chair, and well.. had it done haha :) I didn't even scream or cry or anything :) I can't believe it. I've wanted it done since I was 12 and now 10 years later its happened :)

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Also, on a crapper note, theres been a bit of a kaffufle lately :/ It seems that this week I've lost 2 good friends because of something which doesn't even involve me, and the sad thing is, I thought I meant more to them than that.

Dean has a tendency to say EXACTLY what hes thinking, which is good don't get me wrong, but he doesn't try to cushion it which can very easily hurt or offend people. After 6 years I've learnt to deal with it, believe me hes said some horrific things to me, but it comes as part of the package, you can't get the good parts without dealing with the bad parts.. no ones perfect.

Anyways, I understand why its hurtful what hes said, and usually when he says nasty things about people to me, instead of agreeing or arguing, its easier to accept his opinion and get on with it. Deans may have hurt them, but hes my boyfriend - not my puppet, I couldn't control him, even if I tried. If I stood in his way, he'd shout over the top of my head. I think people need to realise that instead of thinking I'm part of all this.

I just can't believe they're willing to throw away this friendship, just because of somethings hes said. Am I really that disposable?

Although I don't wanna lose any friends.. I don't think I wanna be friends with people who can play with my emotions like this and not even apologise for hurting me.

I'll never cause problems, I'll never act awkward and as far as I'm concerned I'll always be friendly with them, nothing has changed on my part - except for my opinion of them. This week I've realised that no matter how close I thought we were, it seems ending a friendship is as easy as clicking block and delete on Facebook.